4 Amazing Tips To Take Care Of The Oily Skin

The difficult side of having oily skin is when you apply makeup and want it to stay and also being very shiny on your face through out the day and it can also cause spots and black heads. The reason why you may have oily skin is an over-production of sebum (oil) , often caused by hormonal changes or the products your using are too oily for you. Well I’ve found 4 tips on how you can tackle your oily skin as I have used various different products and techniques through out the years but these 4 really worked for me and I want to share these tip with you on how to tackle oily skin.

1. Eating

There are various ways to tackle oily skin but the first thing you should think about is what you put into your body to cause your skin to be oily. This means be careful of what you consume, try to stay away from anything that says fried in front of it and anything that contains fat, sugar and caffeine. You want to try eating lots of fresh vegetables and fruit as these will give you so much goodness for your skin and will help balance your diet. My problem was I loved junk food like chocolate and sweets so I slowly stopped eating them and now I can really see the difference and I would only treat my self once in a blue moon to one of these things, so it is possible to cut down on the things you love to eat but maybe bad for you. Also try to drink water instead of fizzy or juice drinks as they contain lots of sugar and caffeine and the benefits of drinking water it will quench your thirst, flush out toxins and you won’t put on unwanted weight.

2. Products

Next thing you can do to help tackle your oily skin is to look at the products your using on your face. Try to use products with a none oil based and go for the water based products. The products that I would advise using and that I can’t live with out is a face wash, cleanser, toner and moisturiser by Simple. Reason being is because the product are not expressive and they are easy on the skin. Some girls do think because they have oily skin that they shouldn’t moisturise or use any product on your skin because it would make it worse, wrong. If you leave your skin to do its natural thing, your skin will get more oily to compensate for the lack of moisture on your skin and also will build up the dirt. Cleansers are so important to use on your skin as it helps remove unwanted dirt, oil and dead skin to prevent a build up that can cause spots and toners are used to close your pores so that it reduces oil coming out and prevents dirt going into your pores.

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3. Steaming Your Face

Why not try a steam facial as this will help clear your pores. First pour boiling water into a basin and add two drops per litre of lavender, lemon or sandalwood essential oil and a bunch of chopped mint or parsley. Cover your head with a towel and let the steam play over your skin for up to 10 minutes. Finish by splashing with cool water to close the pores and cleanse, tone and moisturise. Try not to wipe your face with a towel just go straight into cleansing routine as the towel may add dust or dirt into your pores causing spots.

4. Makeup

When doing your makeup try using a primer before applying as this helps to get a even base for your makeup and also helps your makeup to stay. Once finished try using a press powder or loose setting powder as this does what it says, it will set your makeup and help it last longer without too much shine. If your out and about you may need to bring with you a compressed compact powder so that when your face does get a bit shiny you can just top up the powder to matt your face, you may need to do this several time through out the day depending on how oily your skin gets.

Hope you’ve enjoyed these tips and that they help you to tackle your oily skin.

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10 Reasons that Could Be Keeping You Single

1. You’re looking in the wrong places girl. What’s the use in looking for a person you’ll like, in a place you dislike! Start by going to places you enjoy; you’re bound to meet people who you have something in common with you.

2. “A bad experience with dating can frighten women from trusting guys.” Are you being troubled by memories of that terrible blind date? Or that creep from an online dating site?

3.“The ritual of dating has changed because of today’s sexual thinking.” What I mean is people no longer feel like they need to make a commitment to enjoy some of the pleasures that come with relationships, like sex. “Commitment is no longer formalised and people today have a lot more sexual freedom. is this you? Well most men will still say that they respect a girl more as ‘wifee’ material who refrains from such activities.

4. Are you still stewing over your last relationship? A bad breakup can leave you with memories in your head of all the unfair things your ex did. And when you get your new man, you wont let him forget it either. Big no no.

5. Your business or career comes first. Young professionals are so business-career-driven that they simply don’t have time to meet the right person. Or if they do, they spoil it by having no time to spend with them. “Career women spend late nights at work and dedicate a large portion of their lives to their jobs, leaving little for relationships.”

6. Are you’re hooked on relationship drama? There’s a good reason you can get caught up in drama, relationships with crazy bad boys that have this animal attraction that we all fall for.

7. We pour ourselves out to fast. Anyone who’s a big part of your life should know everything about you, including the serious stuff … but all in good time. Making a full disclosure about how many babies you want or challenges and troubles you’re facing before you even know if the relationship is a starter will guarantee it won’t be.

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8. Do you always fall for unavailable guys? Running after guys that are taking, married, or otherwise unavailable men isn’t likely to get you to happily ever after. Leave them well alone!

9. Do you cling like super glue? If you’re the type to call and ring your man 24/7 and gate crash his guys’ night because you “missed him,” then honey beware: As much as you think he loves you, men are put off women with insecurities and desperation type tendencies .

10. Do you hop into bed too soon? If you’re used to casual hookups and then the wam bam thank you man, then expect the man to to treat you as a booty call or give you that love ’em-and-leave ’em attitude which may hurt when you want something deeper.

Can you think of any other reasons why women remain single?

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7 Signs He’s About to Propose

 

Is your guy acting a little…different? It could be a sign of bright bling to come. His apartment is clean, he’s saving money, and Thursday night poker with the guys has turned into date night with you? Either your guy is coming down with something, or he’s planning to pop the question. Read on for more telltale signs that he’s ready to say “I do.”

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He’s Growing out of His Bachelor Ways

You can tell his bachelor days are behind him when his number-one priority is no longer himself. If he’s constantly using terms like “we” and “our,” and plans for a weekend with the guys in Vegas are suddenly on the back burner while weekend picnics with you are becoming more common, he’s probably not just sick of his buddies. He might’ve realized that he prefers a more settled lifestyle, and this transition puts him squarely on the path to proposing.

He’s Redecorating

You may also notice certain items have disappeared from his pad, like his college posters and Star Wars memorabilia. Did he ditch that ugly brown chair for a nice new couch? It could be the start of major changes — your boyfriend is making room in his life for you, both physically and emotionally.

He’s Curbing Big Purchases

Has your boyfriend gone from big spender to Scrooge? The plasma-screen TV he’d been planning to buy isn’t hanging over his mantel, and instead of buying rounds of drinks at happy hour after work, he’s home cooking dinner. No, he’s not training for Top Chef; he’s started to eliminate frivolous spending to brace for a large down payment (on your engagement ring). And it’s not just the jewelry he’s saving for — he may be putting away money now so that the two of you will be comfortable well into the future. 

He’s Not Complaining About Weddings
While at a wedding together, it’s more than just the usual eagerness for an open bar. He’s not cracking jokes during the vow exchange — he’s commenting on the couple’s first-dance song choice and the meal selection. Take it as a sign that he’s paying attention to all things wedding-related because matrimony is on his mind. 

He’s Taken an Interest in Your Jewelry
Has he been complimenting your great ability to accessorize? Snooping around in your jewelry box? Holding your hand, constantly? All kidding aside, when your favorite ring goes missing, you’ll know for sure that he’s trying to find a covert way to figure out your size. 

He Wants to Meet the Parents
Okay, so he’s probably already met your parents. If he hasn’t and has become insistent on meeting them, it’s probably for a good reason. But if he already knows them well and has become the first to RSVP for your nephew’s birthday party, jumps at the chance for a weekend visit with your parents, or, even more telling, tries to plan outings for both your families to hang out together, he’s ready for the next step. 

 

He’s Acting out of Character
You know his daily routine inside and out, and any variation is enough to give you pause. If he’s super-insistent that you guys do something you never do (like take a walk through a park or drive to a place to watch the sunset), he may be setting you up to speak those four little words: “Will you marry me?” After all that hard work, be sure to make it easy on him and say yes!

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14 Tips To An Incredible Life

 

So what do you dream about doing with your life? This is your time, your chance at being someone who can make a difference and be brilliant. Your time to love hard, work hard, play harder and kick your high heels up, create some magic, and change lives. Your time to make someone smile and laugh. You can be fun, you can be sexy, you can be you and dance naked in the sun (just make sure no one else is around lol)

Nobody on this planet is perfect so stop trying to be. You don’t have to be right. You just have to be you. That is exactly how we are just being us.

 

So here are 14 tips to help you lead an extraordinary life by embracing YOU in all your glory. Get ready to glow sunshine!

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1. Practice acceptance for yourself as you are and the best of you.

2. Stop trying to be everything to please everyone.

3. Laugh and smile as much as possible.

4. Balance your input into your mind by reading, watching, learning along with your out-put to creating, giving and inspiring.

5. Really take care of your body: eat healthy, exercise, don’t smoke, eat less, move more, sleep 8 hours, learn to listen to your inner signals.

6. Always celebrate your successes no matter how small. Celebrate others’ successes too don’t be a hater, be a congratulator ;p

7. Embrace your strengths and stop worrying about your weaknesses.

8. Always Tell the truth about yourself.

9. Set boundaries with your time, energy and money. Respect them.

10. Be colourful, its much more enlightening.

11. Create meaningful connections with things like faith, loves and friendships.

12. Ignore the haters. It’s your life, your legacy, your choice.

13. Share your story of your successes with the younger generation

14. Take your dreams very seriously and go for them.

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See Yourself As Others See You

 

It is quite possible to see yourself exactly as other people see you; however, this takes courage, and the development of some insight. So, if you dare, have a peek in the mirror.

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1. Understand that other people are your mirror. A simple concept, yet one that many people are either unwilling, or unable, to grasp. Summed up, it is simply that other people reflect you. Your emotions, your traits, and your feelings are reflected back at you from other people either through in-kind responses or through predictable reactions to the emotions or feelings that you're issuing. Perhaps even more surprising is the reality that the reflection is perfect, even if the "reflector" is almost invariably not. For example, you might feel condescension, irritability, or dismissive toward another person, which lowers your estimation of them and causes you to treat them less seriously; yet in doing so, you ignore the fact that they reflect your negative appraisal of them.

• Intellectually "challenged" people can provide the highest quality "reflections" for others' behavior, while being personally oblivious that a "mirror" exists; this has to do with their lack of inhibition and their inability to dissemble. Such people more innately reflect the signals and body language you are "sending" them.
• It is quite easy to go through your entire life, in many Western cultures at least, and never develop the innate skill of spotting yourself being reflected in other people; any development in this area will improve you self-insight and your relations with others.
• This "mirror-gazing" skill is more developed of necessity in people of diminished means who need to learn quickly how to read people well in order to survive; however, just because you have never been hungry, left alone, or impoverished, does not mean you have to be clueless about yourself.
• See that a big part of "seeing yourself" is recognizing that some little behavior of someone else's, witnessed by you, is in fact exactly what you look like when exhibiting that same behavior, and that your rationalization of it as "different from yourself" is what is incorrect about your interpretation.

2. Recognize that people say things to you, or about you, for a reason. While it can be easy (in fact it's human nature) to dismiss anything not felt to be relevant, or not seen to be complimentary, and to see it rather as a reflection of the person saying or commenting about things you're not comfortable with (to an extent it's about them but that's not the whole story), for the most part it probably has a grain of truth in it for you. Even if it is painful and your ego tempts you to reject it out of hand, be alert to this probability. It is less important that you identify with what may have been actually said here; rather, what matters is connecting it with the times that you say the same thing to another. It is perilously easy to con yourself into believing that "those times were different." They invariably aren't, or weren't.

3. Recognize that this person-to-person mirror is a two-way mirror. Just as people say things to or about you for various, possibly obscure but knowable reasons, recognize when you do the same thing. Examine why you may have said a certain thing; usually, this self-examination will occur after the fact. Don't be afraid to ask someone you trust to help you work through the reasoning; for example, if your best friend heard you, they almost surely already know why you said something and what personal motivations, quirks, and needs lie behind it. Asking your friend with open honesty and a willingness to reflect together can take a friendship to a whole new level. Asking another how our words and demeanor come across to another is not something we stop and do much but it is definitely a worthwhile activity to try

4. Consider that a person whom you detest is invariably your perfect mirror – they are just like you. While this may seem strange or even offensive to you, experience often bears it out. The reason is that we invariably overlook behaviors in ourselves that we can't tolerate in another. By allowing the other person to carry the burden of our own disliked inner quirks or weaknesses, we shield ourselves from having to meet our less likable aspects head on and choose instead to view the unlikable traits as the fault of the other person. Often we see this as insurmountable because we choose to believe that the other person is the one generating the unwanted behavior. However, this blinds us to realizing that we're just locking horns with traits we haven't yet learned to deal with well inside of ourselves.

5. Continue seeing yourself as others see you throughout life. This isn't a one-off exercise. It's something that will benefit you and your relationships for all time, and as such, it's essential that you continue to remain alert and willing to see yourself reflected in others around you. Once you have refined seeing yourself, exactly as others see you, by witnessing the reflections in and from others, you will find yourself more forgiving of others, more willing to reach out and pull people through awkward moments and difficult times because you see not only your own struggles but theirs too, all intertwined as one. And all this takes is constant self-examination, self-honesty, and a willingness to step outside yourself regularly.

6. Recognize the opportunities in a relationship challenged by your intense dislike of one another. While you may never learn to like each other, opportunities exist here for personal behavioral modification. Indeed, often the most rewarding of outcomes can result when you push yourself to cope with people whom you find challenge you in this respect because you ultimately learn to manage, if not learn to tolerate, a part of yourself that you didn't even want to face before. Experience dictates that even if you initially do not communicate any of your intentions to modify your own behavior to your mirror, being that they invariably feel the same about you as you do about them, they will eventually (usually, pretty quickly) notice that they aren't able to push your buttons. If you are using this experience for self-improvement, it will be clear that you aren't taking advantage of opportunities to push theirs. This is going to be noticed (and not just by your mirror), and credited to you as maturity; bonus points for having the courage to come clean with your mirror, and tell them about your insight into this matter, leading to future mutual progression. And even more kudos to you if you do this personal development in the public sphere; as it's no easy task, it impresses people to see such maturity and rest assured that anyone within earshot will be enthralled.

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Top Tips for Deal With a Broken Heart

 

It’s at time hard to come up with the best way to deal with a break up especially when you are still feeling raw. Rejection is painful and leads to frustrations, anger and a lot of anguish.

You need to know how to deal with these emotions within the first weeks after a break up. This ensures that you remain with your respect and dignity as you recover from the pain. This is good because life must go on and you can find another person to love when the pain is over.

Top Tips :

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1) Rest in the following weeks after the break up, you should only do what you feel is necessary. Don’t strain yourself because you are already mentally and emotionally strained. Give yourself time to recover from the loss and also mourn. During such a time, you will feel lonely, sad and hopeless. It’s normal.

2) Eat a healthy diet, get enough rest and do not quit your job or classes. You will feel tempted to sleep all day, but you must work to achieve your goals in life. Take good care of your personal appearance and know that you still have a life to live. This ensures that when the pain subsides, you still have your life in control and you can move on properly.

3) You should not forget that you can still live even without your partner. Try to remember things that you can do on your own and also your strengths. You can write some positive points about yourself on a piece of paper. This can be a good strategy to learn on how to get over a break up and a good reason keep yourself aware that you are still lovable.

4) You should avoid seeing your ex as much you can in order to rebuild sense of identity. This may not be easy, but it is possible. This has been recommended by many experts on how to deal with a break up. Separation will allow the two of you to think if you need to get together or part ways forever.

5) You need a friend or a relative to talk to when you are very lonely. This will help you stop thinking about ways to revenge against your ex. Doing some things will only land you in more trouble which will make your life even more sad. Avoid acting on crazy thoughts and talk to someone to calm down.

When you try to figure out how to deal with a break up, remember that you need enough time before moving on. Do things that you have always enjoyed doing before the break up and do not get into another relationship to forget your ex. This can put you into more problems.

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The Six Biggest Mistakes Shopping

 

Many people without realizing spend the money to buy goods that are not useful in the future. Simply find discount at a department store with a leading brand. But are you aware that it is your fault in the shop.

Some other errors related to these activities, among others;

• Never force a center of fashion clothes on the market trend, while not allowing your body to wear it. Because the center of fashion in clothes, usually reserved for those who are ideal. Here you have the need to tailor your subscription, if you liked the outfit that was in, you can imitate and sew to tailor your subscription.

• It is better than shopping with your beloved friend that consumptive. Because, he will be persuaded to do the same with him. Or at least suggest to buy things he likes, but does not match your bag.

• If you intend to buy a dress for cocktail parties, bring shoes that will be charged. That way, the store usually will recommend a suitable type of dress with shoes.

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• No one can guarantee the ordering shoes from a brochure which were spread out, without you having to come direct and try it. So, avoid it, how expensive the types of shoes on display in the brochures that you get.

• Do not buy something you do not need, because persuaded with a massive sale. And you know, that every time there will be a massive sale, but remember, this activity is a big waste and useless.

• Do not also buy because other people drive. Ask yourself whether I need this stuff? Does it fit with my lifestyle and wardrobe?. If you hesitate to buy it, you should immediately place it. Conversely, if thought useful in the future, you buy a so-so, although you should keep it in a time not too long

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Smart Shopping Tips

 

Always dizzy when calculating your monthly expenses? That's the sign you have not shopped with intelligent (smart shopping) so that spending remains under control.

Here are the steps to overcome the excessive spending as quoted from She knows.

1. Make a list of expenses

How spending could run as you wish if you do not make the list? Before shopping, make a shopping list for sure. This also will reduce the risk of any forgotten items.

2. Bowing to the list

No use is made shopping list if you break them. Obey the list, and do not be tempted to buy things that are not needed just because the discount is tempting.

3. Creative

No need to buy all of your shopping list at the same place. It may be in other stores you can get it cheaper. But do not forget to also take into account the cost of travel, such as taxi money, or gasoline. Do-do if the count is calculated, the result is the same or more expensive. Think creatively as possible.

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4. Needs vs. Desire

To shop smart, you should know that clear boundaries between needs and wants. Do not make a biased view. Of course needs must always come first, but if you have more savings, there's no harm in indulging themselves by fulfilling the desire.

Happy shopping!

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Ten Things for Get Over a Break Up

 

Breakups can be rough, and they can be amicable; no matter what, no one really wants to go through them. The loss of your relationship can bring on intense heartache. But if you're looking for some help getting through it and want some suggestions about how to make it a little easier, read on...

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Steps : 1. Don't rethink your decision. If the breakup was your decision, keep in mind that only thinking about all the good times you had with your partner may cause you to forget the reasons why you broke it off. By the same token, try not to second-guess the situation if the decision to end things was not yours. It's very common to romanticize the good parts of the relationship, convincing yourself that maybe the bad parts weren't so bad after all, that maybe you could just live with them. Or that maybe if your ex would know just how you feel, he/she wouldn't want to break up after all. Don't play this game with yourself. Accept the situation and work on moving forward.

2. Think through everything thoroughly, but not obsessively. Go ahead and mull it over, as many times as necessary, within reason. Consider all the reasons you two broke up. Even if it sometimes seems as if there wasn't a good reason, there certainly was one - and probably more than one. Understand that you enjoyed being together for a while, but if the relationship was not what both you and your partner wanted for life, it would have ended eventually, no matter what. In this case, better sooner than later. Thinking about the reasons why it ended can make it much clearer to you that it takes two people to start a relationship, but just one discordant person is enough to end it. It may also help you avoid many missteps in the future if you can identify areas where you contributed to the demise of the relationship.

3. Keep your space. Even if you and your ex have decided to stay friends, break away completely from each other right after the breakup. This means not seeing each other, not being around his/her family members, no phone calls, no e-mails, no text messages, no Facebook, and no IMs - not necessarily as a permanent measure, but until you feel that you can converse with him/her on a purely platonic level, without an ulterior motive (and yes, wanting to get back together counts as an ulterior motive). If he/she tries to convince you to see him/her, ask yourself honestly what the point would be. If you're reliving the past by seeing him/her, it's not hard to get caught up in the moment and it will be harder to let go again. You may have to have some contact in order to deal with the practical aspects of things like moving out, signing papers, etc., but try to limit this to what's absolutely necessary, and then keep such calls/meetings short and civil.

 

4. Cope with the pain appropriately. It's okay to feel like you have messed up - accepting responsibility for your mistakes or shortcomings is healthy. On the other hand, you must also accept that you are a good person, and that you did your best and you're not the only one who made mistakes. Of course, a stage of denial is completely natural, but acceptance is the key to being able to start moving on.

5. Don't think you're unlikeable! There are plenty of fish in the sea If he/she wasn't the fish, your emotions are telling you. Find someone else. Remember there will always be someone out there for you!

6. Talk to your friends. You want people around you who love you and who will help you feel good about yourself. Surrounding yourself with compassionate, supportive friends and family will help you see yourself as a worthwhile person, and you'll find it easier to get steady on your feet again with your loved ones around you in a comforting net. But be wary of friends trying to connect you with another person right now, this is not what you need. If you feel you are burdening your friends, consider making an appointment with a counselor or psychologist. These thoughts are irrational and are generally an early indicator of depression.

7. Write all your feelings down. Write in a journal or try writing poems. The most important thing is to be absolutely honest and don't edit yourself as you go. One of the best results of writing it all down is that sometimes you will be amazed by a sudden insight that comes to you as you are pouring it all out onto paper. Patterns may become clearer, and as your grieving begins to lessen, you will find it so much easier to understand valuable life lessons from the whole experience if you've been writing your way through it. No relationship is ever a failure if you manage to learn something about yourself. Just because it didn't work out doesn't mean it wasn't a necessary part of your journey to becoming who you're meant to be.

8. Out with the old, in with the new. A breakup can signify a new beginning. Therefore, cleaning and organizing your personal space will leave you feeling refreshed and prepared for the new things to come. A mess can be overwhelming and depressing, and will just add to your stress level. The added bonus is that keeping busy with tidying your space doesn't require a lot of brain power, but does require just enough focus to keep you from recycling pain. Occupying yourself with such tasks designed to make your life better and easier will also occupy your mind enough to help you through the residual pain. Clean your room, get some new posters, clean up the icons on your PC desktop. As insignificant as cleaning up sounds, it'll make you feel better.

 

9. Find happiness in other areas of your life. Whether that means spending time with your friends and family, signing up for that class you've always wanted to take, or reading every book on the New York Times bestseller list, remind yourself that a relationship is one part of life, but even when you are in one, there are personal pleasures that you can always enjoy on your own. Indulge in those things now. As they say, the best revenge is living well. Enjoy being single.

10. Stop thinking of him! If he's not on your mind you'll get over him really fast! It might be hard to stop thinking about him but the only way to get over him is NOT to to start dating some one else.

Finally we must all remember a heart break or an emotional set back only gives us a chance learn more from life and move on. Our set backs make us grow and strengthen our relationships with our family members as we know that in times of crisis it is our own people who give us the love and moral support to carry on.

Last but not the least it is our positive attitude in life which carries us forward and equips us to face life’s challenges with courage and determination   

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5 Ways for Still Have Fun when You Lonely

 

Being lonely is hard, and many people can become very depressed because of it. Whether you're going to be alone for one night or one year, this article should help you not only cope with being lonely, but have fun while doing

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1. Be productive. Is there something you've always wanted to do? Maybe you wanted to learn origami, or a new language. Maybe it's time to clean your room, or try to cook. Go on a run. Not only will you feel better, but you might meet someone along the way.

2. Think of the reasons why you're lonely. Chances are that you're lonely for a reason, maybe you're grounded, or your all of your friends are on vacation! Maybe you've just moved to a new place, and are having trouble getting used to it. Either way, it's not shameful to be alone, you have a reason. Everybody gets lonely.

 

3. Try to talk to the people you do see. Have a conversation with your dad or your sister or brother. Try to talk to classmates or colleagues as well. Talk to your pet if you need to. Don't let yourself get used to being alone, this will make it more difficult to talk to others later.

4. Try texting someone if your friends went to a party that you couldn't go to, ask them to come over the next day and tell you all about it.

5. Don't give up. You won't be lonely forever.

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Eight Reason for Never Give Up!

1- As Long As You Are Alive Anything Is Possible

The only valid excuse you have to give up is if you are dead. As long as you are alive (and healthy and free) you have the choice to keep trying until you finally succeed.

2. All could change for the better at any time

Sure, right now it stinks. But it could all alter in a blink of an eye. If you keep striving and searching at some point a breakthrough will occur. That could be today, tomorrow or in the next hour. You don’t know but why walk away when the turn of the tide could come at any moment?

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3. Tomorrow is another day

Today hurts. Today your emotions are all over the place. You are lost and feeling beaten. Who hasn’t at some point? But that’s only today. Tomorrow hasn’t happened yet. Take a look at tomorrow’s date. It’s never existed before. It’s a brand new day. And with it can come brand new answers and information and the tide turns. The past has always given way to the future and tomorrow yours could be very bright. 

4. You Are Strong
You are stronger than you think. One little setback is not enough to stop you from achieving your goals. Neither are 10 or 100 or 1000 setbacks.

5. Be Realistic
The chance of mastering something the first time you do it is almost non-existent. Everything takes time to learn and you will make mistakes. Learn from them.

6. Your Family and Friends.
Let the people you love and who mean the world to you be your inspiration to persist and persevere. Maybe you need to try a different angle, study more or practice more but don’t give up!

7.  It could be a wake up call

Not all problems are hassles without a meaning. Some are caused by ourselves. Whilst we want the quickest doorway out of darker periods they make actually point to how we have been long damaging or sabotaging our own life. Continued nightmare scenarios are a sign that we need to take a good hard look at what we may be doing. They are the effects but we are the cause. If darkness persists maybe it’s time to shed light on the real source?

Some wake up calls start with an alarm first.

8. Prove Yourself
You don’t want to be known as someone that is weak and gives up. Go out there and prove yourself to the world and to yourself. You CAN and WILL achieve what you set out to do. The only time you fail is when you give up.

As I write this the sun is shining. On my smiling face. I made it and so can you. Don’t give up PLEASE because you have every reason not to. And the main one is you. You will shine and good times will come again. Back then I was promised that one day I would cry tears of happiness. Today writing this post the promise was kept. I promise you one day you will do the same.

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Plan a Scenic Road Trip for Weekend

What better way to spend a weekend then by getting away from everything and journeying on a scenic road trip with a friend or loved one. Pick a few places to visit, stay at a bed and breakfast, hike and enjoy the hidden spots of nature. Whether it is a romantic getaway or an exciting, fun adventure, a scenic road trip can be an excellent way to relax and unwind.

Instructions :

1. Make your road-trip plan. Select the roads and highways you will take. Select the sites you want to see. Maybe you will want to stop by a national park with hiking trails, a back-road local winery, a scenic overlook or maybe a small town in the middle of nowhere with fun places to eat or shop. Plan out the details of your trip.

Also, calculate how much gas you will use, costs of accommodations, food, entry fees to parks, and other things you are likely to spend your money on during the trip. Split up the fees with your friends taking the trip with you. Prepare a packing list of things to bring. Try to book any accommodations in advance.

2. Get your vehicle checked out. A fresh oil change and a tire service are greatly encouraged. Make sure your vehicle is in good working order before departing. It would not be good to break down on a desolate country road with the nearest town miles away. Prepare your vehicle for the road. Find the cheapest gas in your area and fill up your tank. A good tank of gas should last you a couple of days. It's always best to fill up before departing.

3. Buy food and pack all necessary items for the trip. In addition to food, bring extra cash for souvenirs and meals along the way. Establish a meeting time and place to begin the trip.

4. Create a road-trip binder or folder. You can use it to hold all of your accommodation reservations, parks and attractions information, maps and any other information you might need on your trip.

5. Start your journey. Be sure to designate someone as navigator to follow maps and lead you from each destination to the next.

Things You'll Need:

* Vehicle

* Maps

* List of destinations

* Camera

* Cash

* Itinerary

* Cellular phone (for emergency calls)

* Camping gear (if camping)

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10 Ways to Find a Modern Day Mr. Darcy

So, you've read Pride and Prejudice (or you've seen the movie) and you're in love with Mr. Darcy: but do modern-day Mr. Darcys really exist?

While Elizabeth had to look beyond a gruff exterior to find the kindly, thoughtful, and intelligent man within Mr. Darcy, your modern-day Mr. Darcy might be right before you in many guises, as long as you stay true to yourself. For the single woman, here are some tips on seeking your modern-day Mr. Darcy, along with some advice on not making things too hard on yourself or your suitors!

Steps :

1. Be careful whom you reject. Clearly, the traits given a book character by an author represent an ideal. Loving an ideal can lead to sadness and frustration, particularly when no guy ever matches up to your mental image and you're endlessly rejecting a string of interested men. Even Elizabeth had an image in her mind of the "right" man for her, and Mr. Darcy didn't fall into this category to begin with. Rather, she saw him as conceited, thoughtless, proud to a fault, and unkind. Fortunately, given her strength of character, she was able to change her original opinion when some of his true character came to light and she opened her heart and mind more to his real self. Be careful that you're not chasing phantom ideals but that your high expectations are grounded in reality.

2.  Look for attainable, desirable traits. If you're going to find a modern-day Mr. Darcy, Austen's Darcy reveals a few that are worth considering: 

• Evident intelligence and wit. Elizabeth is able to participate in witty conversations with Mr. Darcy precisely because both of them are intelligent and thoughtful. Mr Darcy tends to think things through rather than jumping to conclusions.
• Ability to support himself. In Pride and Prejudice, Mr. Darcy is independently wealthy. Clearly, most men you meet will not be so wildly independently wealthy as Mr. Darcy was portrayed. However, it is important that your modern-day Mr. Darcy finds purpose in working and values what his money can help him to achieve.
• Is unafraid to speak his own mind. Mr. Darcy is known for being straightforward.
• Is loyal. Mr. Darcy is very loyal to his family and those he considers as friends.
• Is caring about those close to him, both friends and family. For example, Mr. Darcy is more than ready to stand in and bail out family when Lydia runs off with Mr. Wickham, and he is always protective of his sister Georgiana.
• Is a good listener. Mr. Darcy is shown to be able to listen to Elizabeth. He also proves himself to be "teachable" after she rebukes him for wrongful behavior she believes he has committed. Leah Orcutt suggests that men who are "teachable" are on the way to being of "high character".
• Is able to express his opinion and feelings.
• Has a good reputation.

3. Stay level-headed and considerate. It's easy to label your date negatively when you feel he has been unsympathetic toward you or perhaps doesn't pay you much regard. It's natural for the ego to seek to feel better instead of viewing this as an opportunity to try and find another way to connect. Stay open-minded about the men you date – Elizabeth kept her wits about her and continued her life as always despite her shock at what she thought was Mr. Darcy's unkind deeds. When she did voice her disgust at him, she made it clear what mattered to her without turning it into a nasty fight. Rely on your wit and tenacity to win around a man who might initially seem disdainful or distant, even if it's just for the sake of having good professional or social relations with him; after all, taking the upper hand is always the more ladylike approach.

4. Date gentlemen only. There are plenty of gentlemen out there in the world; you just have to look for them. Gentlemen show up in surprising places, so you might have to take the time to get to know a guy to uncover his gentlemanly qualities. In other words, don't judge a book by its cover. At the same time, you can't assume that on the inside, all guys are gentlemen underneath it all; some guys are just jerks, and you'll just have to avoid them or gently move on from them on your way to finding your modern day Mr. Darcy. 

•  If your date opens doors for you (chivalrous), truly listens (thoughtful), is concerned about your needs (kind), and appears in most respects to be a thoroughly modern gentleman, he is very much a modern-day Mr. Darcy.

5.  Learn how to spot the difference between confidence and arrogance. Mr. Darcy is proud, but he surprises Elizabeth when she discovers that he's not the conceited man she thought he was. When finding your modern-day Mr. Darcy, always look beyond the bravado and quips aimed at avoiding embarrassment at having to show he likes you in public. What may seem like arrogance could be shyness, discomfort in your presence, or even a mangled attempt at being polite. Try not to dismiss behavior or responses that seem initially aloof, stand-offish, and arrogant. Sum up the context, the company you're in at the time, and his other mannerisms before deeming him a write-off for being too conceited. Look for consistency of behavior; if he's truly arrogant, he'll continue making facetious and condescending comments, he'll care little for others, displaying his superiority over others. On the other hand, if he's self-assured, you'll see that he does care for others, and that he doesn't place himself above others; rather, he'll be confident and feel on an equal footing with anyone he knows and meets.

• Even if you do feel you're dealing with Mr. Arrogant, keep your wits about you and respond politely but make it clear that there are limits to your tolerance of condescension and contempt.

6. Be careful whom you fall for. On the one hand, it's comforting and dreamy to yearn after a man like Mr. Darcy-like. On the other hand, you could risk seeking unobtainable men whose character is tortured, repressed, moody, and ultimately unattainable if the men you're dating show all the signs of Mr. Darcy's negative character and none of his redeeming features. In this case, you may be going after men who will never connect fully with you and who are commitment-phobic, causing continuous hurt. If this is a pattern you find you're not able to break, talk it over with your therapist to try and uncover the underlying cause.

• Bear in mind that Jane Austen didn't write "The Marriage of Mr and Mrs Darcy". A lifelong commitment takes more than smoldering good looks, a miraculous emotional opening up to you of a previously tough and difficult character, and outward appearances. If you marry someone who has the potential to be deeply moody and finds it difficult to express his emotions, you risk a difficult marriage. Be sure that your modern-day Mr Darcy is all you want in a lifetime mate and more before committing till death do you part.
• Date for a good period of time to find out whether your modern-day Mr Darcy has any control-freak tendencies or a need to dominate.

7. Don't chase after men. Elizabeth didn't do anything to cause Mr Darcy to fall for her, other than to be her usual lovable self. She didn't feel the need to throw herself at anybody. She didn't turn herself into something that betrayed her true nature, and she certainly wasn't swayed by the vacuous and often nasty social climbing ways of many of the characters. Elizabeth remained true to herself, and presented that reality to all, including to Mr. Darcy.

• Ask yourself whether it's pride or prejudice driving you to chase a man who isn't right for you. You don't have to prove anything to someone who spurns you; leave it be.

8. Value yourself. Elizabeth was a character ahead of her time, clearly valued for her intelligence and self-respect. Yet, she was also created in a time when a woman needed to ally herself well with a man for the sake of economic well-being. Seeking a modern-day Mr. Darcy involves finding the right partner to share your life with, and part of this must include him respecting your choices and independence. Don't change your beliefs, your values, or your opinions for the sake of someone else; be open-minded when discussing topics and listening to new views and ideas but don't be easily enslaved by Cupid's arrow. Maintain your independent thought and reassure your modern-day Mr. Darcy that you can, and always will, think for yourself.

• Be sure that you're evenly matched. Elizabeth reveled in the intellectual stimulation provided by her encounters with Mr. Darcy and the reader is left with the impression that their marriage would be one of many evenings spent in front of the fire philosophizing together.
• Mr. Darcy was impressed by Elizabeth's loyalty, affection, and dedication to her family and friends. A modern-day Mr. Darcy does not fear your love and attachment to your family and friends. Indeed, he finds that endearing.

9. Check his romance credentials. Find a man who thinks of the little things, who holds your hand just because you like it, who starts reading Twilight or Pride and Prejudice because it's your favorite book. Find a man who wants to understand you better by learning more about what moves you.

• It goes without saying that the modern-day Mr. Darcy, so entertainingly resurrected in Bridget Jones' Diary in the form of Mark Darcy, would always echo the sentiment of Mark Darcy when he said: "I like you very much. Just as you are"

10. Work at your relationship. Unlike the end of a novel, real life relationships continue and require constant work and injection of romance. But if you're after a modern-day Mr. Darcy, that shouldn't be too hard!

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Become More Imaginative Through Introspection and Thought

"Imagination is not a talent of some people, but it is the health of every person." Ever wonder exactly what gives a person an air of creativity and intelligence? Have you ever desired to have the imagination of great artists and writers? Though you won't become exactly like them, following are a few tips and ideas to help you along the way to greater imagination.

Steps :

1. Realize your potential as a human being. You are a person, just like Frank Herbert and Stanley Kubric and many other famous and infamous authors and artists. Einstein was a human, as was Galileo. Once you realize that you are just as human and just as capable as anyone else, your journey to unlocking your inner creative mind has begun.

2.  Locate your thought and imagination. They come from the mind. Your brain is a complicated maze of neural pathways and electrochemical activity. It is within this mess of complexity that your thoughts are created. Imaginative people have similar brains to yours (excluding savants), and your thoughts come from the same places. 

3. Decide your avenue of approach. Some people use their intelligence to pursue writing, while others become skilled in mathematics or sculpting, or a myriad of other activities. Examine your likes and dislikes and decide for yourself how you want to take advantage of your imagination. None are any less or better than the other; what matters is how you choose to explore the pathways within your chosen field of talent or passion. 

 

4. Always be aware of yourself. Oftentimes authors lose themselves in their works, and they pursue a fruitless path in their writing. Oftentimes when acceleration occurs, the author fails to give due attention to the credence of their pursuit. Get into the habit of asking questions, and answer either spontaneously or with considerable thought. 

5. Think totally contrary to logic. Do you have a friend who speaks random, ridiculous phrases that seem to defy logic and rational thought? Your friend may be more imaginative than you. Try your friend's non-logical approach to other areas of your life; for example, you could try to solve a problem using only penguins and mason jars. Perhaps you could construct a dwelling consisting entirely of cola cans or pencils. Visualize any benefits to such a strange thing. Apply this to your thought process. 

6. Understand that hesitation is normal and can be overcome. Writer's block is a notorious nemesis to authors, and a creative slump strikes the greatest of artists. This is a form of procrastination, the idea that something could be done later, or that something can't be done because you "don't know the right way to do it." Try a new approach: deliberately apply the above step to the situation. Is your book character not progressing? Introduce a random element, such as a new friend, a death or possibly an alien invasion, and visualize your character's reaction. It may shed insight on how to progress with your story, and you can save or scrap the ridiculous revision you made and begin anew. 

7. Exercise your ability to spontaneously create. Anyone can take a box of Lego bricks and create a building, spaceship or robot, provided they put their mind to it and do not curtail their idea of the structure to what is already known. Try writing whatever it is you're thinking about; do not hesitate or apply conscious mental effort and don't be hemmed in by what you've been taught to think is "the right way". Practice the ability to think of new things spontaneously; though this is contradictory to the above mentioned step, spontaneity is crucial to your overall ability to create and imagine. 

8. Practice, research, and contemplate. Say you have decided to apply your imagination to writing. Do what many great writers do: research the topic of the material being written, and write drafts. The key to this method of unlocking your imagination is to think. The more you think of something, and the more ways you approach a subject, the greater your wisdom grows in that area. Think of it in the same way as fermentation of wine; the older or more mature it gets, the more fermented it becomes. In much the same way, thoughts can ferment and improve with time and practice.

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10 Ways to Trust Your Boyfriend

Trust is a key element in having a strong and lasting relationship with your boyfriend. Without trust, your relationship will slowly fall apart.

How do you regain trust that has slipped away because of little things that niggle you or cause you to feel he isn't as responsive or attentive as perhaps he ought to be? In this article, you'll have the chance to explore the ways in which you can learn to trust you boyfriend and move into another stage of your relationship.

Steps :

1. Acknowledge why you don't trust your boyfriend. There can be a number of reasons, from not hearing from him, lack of contact, or something someone else said. Your own instinct tends to add its overlay of worry too, adding up things that may or may not be important. Some of the reasons why your trust may be tested include: 

• You have been privy to a recent revelation about him that casts suspicions on his trustworthiness
• You have had an argument with him and it not only left you feeling sour but left many questions unanswered
• You feel that he has betrayed your trust in him by something that he has done, said, or openly acknowledged to you
• You feel that he is slipping away - he calls you less, he's not coming around to see you much, or he seems to be seeing other people without asking you along too
• You have some other reason for not trusting him.

2. Take it slowly and calm yourself down. Paranoia over the fact that you don't trust him will can cause you to deepen your mistrust rather than to want to seek some valid answers. Whatever has happened to set off your suspicions, it's more than likely that you don't have the full story or perhaps you're not even seeing all the relevant events properly. Before you discard all trust, it is important to do some thinking, questioning, and following up, to get the story straight. Focus on what is at stake and the importance of the relationship, no matter how hard it may seem and no matter how tempting it is to prefer assuming a negative viewpoint of him.

3. Think about your past relationships. Have they ended in heartbreak, mistrust, and anger? If so, you may be primed to be suspicious about a subsequent boyfriend's motives. Having someone betray your trust hurts, and can carry on into your next relationship. If this is the case, talk to your boyfriend about your past relationship (or relationships) and tell him what happened and why it hurt you. Not only will doing this increase your trust in him, he will be able to understand what lies behind your paranoia. Depending on the type of guy he is, he may even be able to help you work through the challenge.

• If you're stuck in an emotional situation where you don't feel that you're able to move past the hurt, this can be a good time to speak with a therapist or counselor in order to mend the wounds of any past relationship that might have caused you to feel paranoid or anxious about current relationships.

4. Talk to him about why you don't trust him. Use tact, but be honest with him. Guys prefer blatant honesty to constantly avoiding, embellishing, or twisting the subject. If you talk to him about it, not only will it make you feel better, but his trust in you will be likely t increase because he'll feel that, even though you don't trust him, you had to courage to come out and talk to him about it anyway. Whatever his response, your courage in speaking so clearly makes you a very good and honest person.

  5. Go the extra mile to increase his trust in you. Be honest, caring, understanding, and trustworthy yourself, before asking someone to do the same. Don't gossip about him and don't be condescending or negative about him to other people; it will get back to him and will only make things harder for you to fix. Open up a little more yourself; this is especially important if you've been keeping your concerns and most intimate self from him. Keep the line of communication open, and let him know what is going on in your life. You don't have to tell him about every time that you stub your toe, or what you ate for breakfast yesterday, but do tell him things. Tell him funny (or sad) stories about your past and encourage him to do the same.

6.  Learn to let little things go. This step is one that is easily overlooked but is vital. Remember that there may be genuine, non-harmful, and even laugh-worthy reasons for why things have happened that caused you to mistrust him. What is important to a guy may not be what is important to a girl, and he may simply have thought nothing of it, while you're busy blowing it all out of proportion. A simple request to explain the situation will suffice in that case. Forgetfulness is a big one with many guys. It's unintentional but it can be infuriating. For example, maybe he just forgot to tell you that he was going out with his friends the same night you wanted to borrow his car. Maybe you didn't tell him, so there was no reason for him to even get that there was an issue; even if you did tell him, maybe it was when he was focused on doing something and he just didn't hear you properly. Whatever the reason, find it out from him before assuming it from within. You'll know whether or not the answers you're given ring true and you can work from there. If they do ring true, let go, let go, let go! Give him the benefit of the doubt and don't assume that he is cheating on you or even not telling you things. Remember that your boyfriend is only human, and will forget things without meaning to. If it was important, remind him gently instead of cussing him out. If it wasn't important, let it go and remember that the little thing fall-outs that go un-blamed can prevent the enormous fight that would have resulted otherwise.

  7. Hold yourself to the same standard before unleashing your anger. Have you always remembered absolutely everything? Do you always listen with absolute clarity? Do you like it when someone suggests that you're not to be trusted? It is important to be compassionate in a relationship and that includes placing yourself into the situation he's in before you approach it. At all times, remain calm and level-headed; shouting and berating any person does nothing to change the situation and can simply deepen the problems.

8. Take the time to create a firm and lasting bond with your boyfriend. Go on fun and romantic dates with each other, engage in activities outside of the bedroom, and don't be serious all of the time. Happier relationships are ones in which there is a lot of room to move, a lot of laughter, and a great deal of trust. In fact, the more trust, often the tighter the bond you'll create. The less trust, the more likely your relationship will end up laden with suspicion and dysfunctional behaviors. Embrace your inner (and more trusting) child, recognize the little, sweet things in life, and help your boyfriend to do the same:

• Go to the park and have him push you on the swings.
• Have a pillow or tickle fight.
• Go to a restaurant and share a plate or a drink with each other.
• Visit a zoo and have fun looking at all the animals.
• Tease him, ever so gently, and let him tease you back. Couples that can handle teasing one another in a fun, kind way, tend to be couples that can handle each other's criticism and enjoy each other's love.

9. Learn the art of small talk. Sometimes telling each other "I love you, I love you, I love you, coochy coo" becomes a little too demanding and one-way. And too many deep and meaningfuls can make each of you resent hanging around each other for fear of when the "next big crisis" is about to crop up. Brighten up your time together by indulging in small talk as a way of filling in the moments where you're just spending time together in each other's company, without expecting anything of one another.

 

10. Last but not least, realize what you gain by loving in trust. While trust does expose us to the potential of another person's betrayal, the opposite is worse – to never trust a person and to never learn what it feels like to have that trust reciprocated and blossom would be unthinkable. Acknowledge that trust encompasses fear of being hurt and yet understand that not being trustful will end up harming your happiness, rather than guarding it. And trust can protect your health; research has shown that people with greater trust are healthier and more humorous! Realize that trust doesn't only let go of the other person, it also lets go of you, opening yourself to the possibilities that this time, you have connected with someone who will reciprocate the trust you've placed in him. And if you're still unconvinced, keep in mind these lovely words from Dick Sutphen:

 "Love me without fear,
Trust me without questioning,
Need me without demanding,
Want me without restrictions,
Accept me without change,
Desire me without inhibitions,
For a love so free...
Will never fly away."

 

Tips :

• Try to be understanding and accepting when the little things come up. Your boyfriend will notice and appreciate the special relationship that the two of your share all the more for it.

Careful :

• Be aware of what your boyfriend is doing and don't be completely blind to his fall-outs. In other words, be trusting but not naive. Trust is a two-way reality. Give of it but don't allow it to be abused. If he is behaving suspiciously and strangely, talk to your girlfriends, or someone you know you can trust about your concerns. Having a sounding board of someone else can help you to work through the concerns realistically.
• If he really is cheating on you, find someone who is more deserving of your trust. If you feel like this is happening again and again to you, revise the type of boyfriend you keep falling for.

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